“He’s real blowed-in-the-glass, you’d never smoke he’d go caterwauling and end up in monkey and parrot time.”

Let’s dissect:

Blowed-in-the-glass:  a genuine, trustworthy individual (Wikipedia: Hobo Expressions used through 1940s)

Monkey and parrot time: a lady left her favorite bird in company with a monkey and during her absence the two animals had a fight.  When she returned the monkey was wiping his scratched face and the almost featherless parrot called out, ‘we’ve been having a hell of a  time.’  a general row or free fight is a ‘monkey and parrot time.’ (1891 American Slang Dictionary by James Maitland)

CATERWAULING: Going out in the night in search of  intrigues, like a cat in the gutters. (1811 Dictionary of the Vulgar Tongue by Francis Grose)

TO SMOKE: To observe, to suspect. (1811 Dictionary of the Vulgar Tongue by Francis Grose)

To sum up “He’s real blowed-in-the-glass, you’d never smoke he’d go caterwauling and end up in monkey and parrot time” means “he’s a really genuine and trustworthy, you’d never suspect that he’d go out on the town all night and get into to fights.”

“I wanted to have a butcher’s so I took a Dublin packet and slapdash, a bracket-faced seven sided animal gave me a dub o’ th’ hick.”

Let’s dissect:

butchers:  Cockney slang meaning look.  Cockney slang, or rhyming slang, was most prevalent in the East End of London.  It consists of replacing a word with the beginning portion of a rhyming phrase.  For example:  substituting ‘look’ with ‘butcher’s hook’ but dropping the ‘hook.’  It may have risen to wide use as a way to keep outsiders from a close community (Wikipedia).

Dublin packet:  turn a corner; to ‘take the dublin packet” viz run around the corner – probably a pun on doubling a corner (A dictionary of modern slang, cant, and vulgar words by John Camden Hotten)

Slapdash:  Immediately, instantly, suddenly. (1811 Dictionary of the Vulgar Tongue by Francis Grose)

Bracket-faced:  Ugly, hard-featured (1811 Dictionary of the Vulgar Tongue by Francis Grose)

Seven sided animal:  you know this one 😉

dub o’th’hick:  A lick on the head (1811 Dictionary of the Vulgar Tongue by Francis Grose)

So, to sum up “I wanted to have a butcher’s so I took a Dublin packet and slapdash, a bracket-faced seven sided animal gave me a dub o’ th’ hick”  means “I wanted to take a look so I turned a corner and suddenly an ugly one eyed man gave me a lick on the head.”