Ramblings and webcomics from LeEMS
It’s normal to instantly start paying more attention when you hear a family name, even for those people whose family names are some of the most common in the world. That’s what happened in my house while we were watching ant man and they kept mentioning the Schmidt Pain Index. What was this thing named after Schmidt, we wondered?
The answer is, that Justin O. Schmidt, an American entomologist born 1947, developed the scale to measure the relative pain and discomfort of hymenopteran stings, himself having experienced many in the course of his research and trapping of the insects. After his original paper in 1983 comparing venom properties, Schmidt refined his scale.
1.0 Sweat bee: Light, ephemeral, almost fruity. A tiny spark has singed a single hair on your arm.
1.2 Fire ant: Sharp, sudden, mildly alarming. Like walking across a shag carpet & reaching for the light switch.
1.8 Bullhorn acacia ant: A rare, piercing, elevated sort of pain. Someone has fired a staple into your cheek.
2.0 Bald-faced hornet: Rich, hearty, slightly crunchy. Similar to getting your hand mashed in a revolving door.
2.0 Yellowjacket: Hot and smoky, almost irreverent. Imagine WC Fields extinguishing a cigar on your tongue.
2.x Honey bee and European hornet.
3.0 Red harvester ant: Bold and unrelenting. Somebody is using a drill to excavate your ingrown toenail.
3.0 Paper wasp: Caustic & burning. Distinctly bitter aftertaste. Like spilling a beaker of Hydrochloric acid on a paper cut.
4.0 Pepsis wasp: Blinding, fierce, shockingly electric. A running hair drier has been dropped into your bubble bath (if you get stung by one you might as well lie down and scream).
4.0+ Bullet ant: Pure, intense, brilliant pain. Like walking over flaming charcoal with a 3-inch nail in your heel.
from Batts, Shelley (2007) “Schmidt Pain Index (Which Sting Hurts the Worst?)” Retrospectacle: a Neuroscience Blog. http://scienceblogs.com/retrospectacle/2007/05/16/schmidt-pain-index-which-sting/
“I set about kittle pitchering any tom long with a circumbendibus chestnut as soon as I see ’em.”
Let’s dissect:
KITTLE PITCHERING. A jocular method of hobbling or bothering a troublesome teller of long stories: this is done by contradicting some very immaterial circumstance at the beginning of the narration, the objections to which being settled, others are immediately started to some new particular of like consequence; thus impeding, or rather not suffering him to enter into, the main story. Kittle pitchering is often practised in confederacy, one relieving the other, by which the design is rendered less obvious. (1811 Dictionary of the Vulgar Tongue by Francis Grose)
TOM LONG. A tiresome story teller. It is coming by Tom Long, the carrier; said of any thing that has been long expected. (1811 Dictionary of the Vulgar Tongue by Francis Grose)
Circumbendibus – round about; a story with no end to it (1891 American Slang Dictionary by James Maitland)
Chestnut – an old story; an often repeated yarn. The average chestnut of the ‘dago’ fruit stand has claims to respect on account of its age, but is not desirable as an article of diet, and ancient stories are equally tiresome (1891 American Slang Dictionary by James Maitland)
So, to sum up: “I start immediately and humorously undermining the stories of any tiresome story teller with a round about, often repeated yarn.”
I went up to Ohio for a family reunion, and, though all my family komme aus Ohio for three or so generations now, I was surprised by differences in local customs I had never considered.
| Ohioans | Floridians |
| put french fries in their salads
have ice damaged roadways have too many geese have an ice cream shop on every corner |
put fish on our salads
have road gators (e.g. truck tire tread) have too many bugs have a coffee shop on every corner |
previous travels: Photomap of Dallas trip for ALA
Unashamedly inspired by (it’s on our Christmas Mix):
A settlement has been reached in a U.S. lawsuit with Warner/Chappell Music over the copyright to “Happy Birthday to You” that will put one of the world’s most recognizable songs in the public domain, according to court papers released on Wednesday and a source close to the case.
Source: Settlement over ‘Happy Birthday’ copyright puts song in public domain | Reuters
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